Wondering in a Forest

Posted: February 23, 2013 in Personal, Poetry/spokenword

 

“I try to be sugar and spice… but I’m melancholy and can’t do anything right…”

 

I’m wondering in a forest

I see the trees around me flourish

But I have not grown

I’ve always known

 

The truth was a lie

Time always flies by

But I have not grown

I’ve been disowned

 

I’m wondering in a forest

But all the trees are taken

Disowned like some foreign tourist

My whole world is shaken

 

All those fantasies

they fed us as children

were not our realities

the truth was hidden

 

I’m wondering in a forest

I found my tree

He’s dead

Thanks society

 

I’m wondering in a forest

won’t somebody find me…

 

The Dream of a Lifetime

Posted: January 27, 2013 in Personal

A nice, homey place, you’re sitting with your family on the second floor of a restaurant owned by the very talented Queen Latifah. People are all around you enjoying the wonderful. The lights are dim, the walls are wood, the tables are wood, and the woods are dark; the medievil tone is set. The food is wonderful! Big turkeys, mashed potatoes, and collard greens. The screams of table numbers, “AP!” “MW!” “CD!”. It’s a pack night; everyone is there, even the stairway to the exit is packed. You and your family start making your way to the exit. You, a kid, decide to go straight to the exit to wait since you’re not paying. As you look around you notice that your entire family is doing the same as you. EVERYONE IS SKIPPING OUT ON THE MEAL! “WHO IS TABLE CD AND DID THEY PAY YET?!?!?”, yelled Queen Latifah. With no hesitation you and your family reply “Yeah.”, knowing that none of you have paid. In fear, you jump in the crowd hoping to get to the bottom of the stairs and out of the build but the crowd’s not moving so you hop out.

With much need of escape, you find another stair cause and decide it to maybe be a form of escape. “Could this be where the bathrooms are?”, You think to yourself. There you were, in the basement. Cold, wet, damp, and dark concrete stone basement. Every was dimly lit by a few fire lit torches and one big controlled fire by the stairs. Two more guys followed me down, big black guys about 6ft tall, big around the waist and everything else, with a mocha complexion to their skin, bright colored striped polo shirts, jeans, kicks, and a low fade. “Could they be doing the same as I?” There was no time to figure it out so you quickly find the men’s bathroom and enter alone. Different from the main basement, the bathroom seemed to have fluorescent lighting, giving the room a bright feel and the room itself was much more warm compared to the rest of the basement. You look over and see the window. Hoping to escape through it, you run over to the window and open it only to find that what should be the basement is about three stories high off the ground in the back so you close the window. “There has to be another way out!”, you think to yourself. In an attempt to find some other way, you leave the bathroom and explore the rest of the basement. You eventually find yourself in a dim stone room that connects to two different torch lit hallways. In the first you notice the two guys from before walking down that hallway but in the second you notice no one is in it. You start to ask to yourself “I wonder where these hallways lead? Could one of them be a one to the actually bottom floor and back door of this place? If so, which one would I take? Maybe I should just follow them.” Then you notice down the very same hallway the two guys took, a girl and her little sister are poking their head out of what looks like a stone vent. They seem to be crawling in the vents! The girl suddenly notices that you see her and pulls her sister back into the vent to find their escape. “The vents? But how are they using those to escape; wouldn’t they just somehow end up back on the main floor?”, You say to yourself. Maybe you were right but you would never know because it was too late.

ALL HELL IS BREAKING LOSS. Queen Latifah has been using this dungeon to hold prison to the most murderous, evil, ugly monsters know to man; and know they were being set free! They were green, they were blue, they were black, they were caucasian, boys, girls, lizards, lions, full of scales, fully clothed, big noses, no noses, distorted eyes, one eye, fish, and just so much more. They were coming from every where, flooding the room like Katrina flooded New Orleans, looking to kills something for food and some for fun. You, not knowing what to do, decide it to be smart to hide behind the big, heavy, dark wooden door to the room thinking that no of the creates would see you or be smart enough to find you back there. YOU WERE WRONG. He was blue-greenish, had a fish head, two arms, two legs, extremely sharp teeth, cloth around his waist, a harness strap from his shoulder to his waist, and he found you first. Using your mind, you create a weapon. A “Hand” gun. You fold in your ring and pinky finger, point you middle and point finger out and close the together, and you leave your them straight up to put your hand in the shape of a gun.  Then dropping your them down to your point finger you shoot the creature only to lift your thumb so you can shoot again if needed. It was very needed for now the other creatures had noticed you. So you repeated the gesture over and over again but there were too many for you to hold off with your hand gun; you need something stronger, something like a force field. So using your mind,  you say out loud with your eyes closed “I ask for a force field to protect me.” POOF! A force field appears and you’re protected but that is not enough for you. “There’s too many of them and they might break through this shield. I need to kill them off somehow.” DING DING DING, you got it! “I ask that this force field reflects the attack of the monsters and kills them when they attack it.” you say out loud, eyes closed. You then open you eyes only to see that your wish didn’t come true. The monsters were trying to break the shield with attacked but none were dying. In an attempt to use magic you know you don’t have, you lift your hand up like Piper of Charmed would to freeze someone and you think in your mind about the shield reflecting their attacks back to them and killing them on the spot. Putting your hands down, nothing happens. It all looks the same. Until a zombie monster throws a fire ball at your shield and it hits the shield, then flies back to kill him instead. It worked! Monsters were dying left and right, well all except for one. She was a little girl. caucasian face, blond hair, brown eyes, very small nose, wrinkled and crinkled hands, long nails, a pink sweater, and a long grey, slimy tail. She was a snail monster girl thing and she was beating on the force field trying to figure out why it wouldn’t break. It seemed the force field only reflects attacks of magic or weapon nature, not hand attacks. With no luck of breaking she looks past you to your right and points at the force field with a face of panic. You look over and find Queen Latifah stand right there, next to the field, close enough to be a part of the force field. With out much thought, she smiles, closes her eyes, puts her point and middle finger of both hands to the corresponding temple and kills your shield. IT’S ALL OVER FOR YOU! The monsters are lifting you up and carrying you away with Queen Latifah in the front leading the way. They’re going throw you in the big fire by the stairs. You’re panicking because you’re gonna die and you know it. Then you remember something you decided while in the force field, “If I get caught, I could always tell them who didn’t pay for table CD. That may be me being a rat but it also may save my life.” At that instance you yell to Latifah, “Please let me go! If you let me go I will tell you who didn’t pay for table CD.” “Oh really?”, she replies. “Yes!”, you say with much panic.

Then in a snap everything is going backwards. The monsters are carrying you back down to the room, Queen Latifah puts your force field back up, the monsters the field killed come back, you field disappears and the fish monster comes back, the monsters disappear and the two guys you say earlier in the night are in the first hallway while the girl and her sister’s heads are poked out of the vents. Then you find yourself propelling towards the stairs at home and flipping forward until everything freezes for two seconds and you’re stand on your two feet fine. Then you start falling and flipping backwards, your head hits the ground and you see little white balls with red vines and blue eyes; you’re losing your eyes. You see a hot pink tongue fly out to touch the salmon pink carpeted stairs. Then you flip back in your room and up into your bed…

Then I wake up. It was all a dream. I wonder what I have just gone through, and how I somehow took control of my dream and gave myself powers that I know very well I did not have before. It was all a dream… all a dream.

How many times…

Posted: December 9, 2012 in Personal

No matter how much I try, I can never be good enough. I wasn’t good enough in High School and even in college it continues. I’ve always asked myself if it was really meant for me to do this and I honestly think that maybe it wasn’t. How could I just not be good enough? The answer is simple; it’s because I’m not meant to do it. No matter how much I want it; no matter how much blood, sweat, and tears I put into trying to get it; no matter how much my heart hurts… I’m not good enough because it’s not meant for me. I wish I could just cry, maybe then I’d feel better then I do now. I wish I didn’t have exams tomorrow because I wish to see no one at the current moment. I’ve signed out of facebook, out of twitter, my phone is turned off. I kinda just wanna give up on it all. School, my dreams, LIFE IN GENERAL! I just don’t know if I can do this anymore. How many times must one fall until they just don’t get up again?

The Struggle: Insanity

Posted: December 7, 2012 in Personal

So I took on the task of taking the Insanity Challenge a few months back. I told myself from the start “I’m gonna do this so I can have a nice body that will attract others”. That’s cray cray right? Looking back at it, I would say that it is. As I continued to push and DIG DEEPER with Shaun T, I started to want this even more for myself. I want a body that I can be happy about. If someone can’t love me for me then… *Shrugs*. This progress was for me; I wanted something more physically, mentally, just period. Insanity has been a ride for me. From the soreness to telling myself “You can’t do this” to falling out on the floor to telling myself “come on Kyree, you got this”. Giving up the Chick-Fil-A was the hardest because that is my favorite meal of choice lol. “The STRUGGLE was REAL!”, but I made it. I finished both months and the recovery week. I, Kyree Tavon LaVey Harris, finished Insanity. So What’s next for me? I actually knew that answer going into month 2. I guess I could share with you. So I will be doing Insanity: Asylum! It’s 30 days shorter and it’s ever harder than the original. This is only the start of what’s next for me though. I am also playing to run Western Carolina University’s Valley of the Lilies Half Marathon & 5k. I’m pretty sure I’ll just stick to the half marathon with this being my first marathon and all. Until then however, I will start using the bonus DVD I got when I ordered insanity to keep the workout going. I am very thankful to have finished this program. All the blood, sweat, tears, and PRAYER were so worth it. I AM READY TO TAKE ON THE WORLD, so BRING IT!

I Wish

Posted: September 23, 2012 in Personal

Sometimes I wish I was rich so I could do what everyone around me can do. I don’t want a big house, I don’t want fancy smansy clothes, and I don’t want the newest car in the universe. With my riches, I would be able to GET INSURANCE so I could finally HAVE MY LICENSE. I would BUY COMFORTABLE CLOTHES THAT MAKE ME LOOK GOOD but don’t cost 80 bucks per item. I finally HAVE A CAR, maybe a nice 2004 or something. I would send lots of money home so that MY FAMILY COULD FINALLY SPEND TIME WITH ME AT SCHOOL. I mean I would like to SEE MY FAMILY ON FAMILY WEEKEND too. NO ONE IN MY FAMILY HAS REALLY ever BEEN TO MY MARCHING BAND PERFORMANCES from 8th grade til now. I wish they could come to a game and WATCH ME DO WHAT I DO with the Pride. I WISH MY FAMILY COULD COME UP AND SEE ME SING with the Catamount Singers and Electric Soul. I WISH I WAS RICH SO MY FAMILY WOULD NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT OUR NEXT MEAL. So WE WOULD HAVE TO STRUGGLE to stretch a week’s worth of food to two weeks. I just WISH I COULD DO MORE FOR MY FAMILY. I also WISH I FELT LIKE I WAS SUPPORTED BY THEM as well. I know there are circumstances that never allowed them to come to my performances but I JUST WANT TO KNOW THAT MY FAMILY SUPPORTS MY CHOICES IN MY LIFE. My not looking for pity or even acceptance. I just NEED SOME SUPPORT. I’m GOING HARD FOR MY DREAMS and sometimes I START TO QUESTION IF I CAN REALLY DO THIS. Some times I wonder “WHO WOULD REALLY BUY MUSIC BY ME?” I just want to know my FAMILY BELIEVES IN ME AND MY DREAM. Sometimes me believing in myself just is not enough. I wish I could get the guts to say this rather than type it…

So I guess it’s time to let the cat out of the bag! As you all may know, I plan on releasing my first single in what has been a long time. I’ve given you all cover after cover and know it’s time for me to return with my original music. If you haven’t seen the teaser already. check it out here:

Now going on I guess it’s time to actually tell you about the single! First off, the tittle. The title of my new single is…

“Yeah”

The sound and the lyrics will be something I’ve not done in any other release you’ve heard from me. The choice of topic is definitely something you all have not really heard me sing about although I have released one song on it a long time ago… Any way, Yeah will be released for download August 22, 2012. I hope you all are as excited as I am about this! It’s gonna be a great your for us dreamers!

Posted: July 28, 2012 in Personal, Poetry/spokenword

When you talked to me, everything was differemt

We’ve watched each other silently but everything was different

You first entered and I knew you were so fine

It’s only been a week since you started but I wanted you to be mine

I hate we waited til the end to even be awkward a little

but even that is more of a diamond from the griddle

Now you’ve talked to me and everything is different

We’ve watched each other silently but everything is different